Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
