you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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