Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
