So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
