Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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