My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize