I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
