sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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