Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
