I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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