just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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