it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
