Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I can't put those talents on a resume
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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