i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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