What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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