My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
