I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
