So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Randomize
