I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
