I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
