Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
