epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
