remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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