can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
