if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
wow bdsm is so cute
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
