I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
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