TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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