Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize