I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Do vagina's smell?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
