The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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