i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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