Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
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