just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
