I am puke
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
