Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
