i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
