remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
