There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize