It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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