So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
