What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Randomize
