So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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