i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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