since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
