Dual....:-)
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
