We're like a lot better than the average bears
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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