I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
