Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
