i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
