ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
