she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
