whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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