The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
